Where in the Hell are They? (Potential Partners)
Hey Doc:
I'm 25, and I've been out of the dating scene as well as college for a couple of years now. I'm not a drinker, so I don't go to bars, and I'm not a dancer, so I don't go to clubs. So where can I go to meet someone who would date a guy like me? And what places are appropriate to approach women, and which places are inappropriate? The best I've been able to come up with is church, but pickings are slim there.
Thanks for the help.
Hello!
Actually, this is a GOOD thing - not going to bars and clubs to meet women.
Here's the reality: women often go to bars and clubs, "dressed to impress" simply to get hit on. That means that they have their "bitch shields" up and it takes some real game to get past this. Frankly, very, very few guys have what it takes to do this, so the women go home with an ego-boost having trashed a bunch of guys and the guys to home with their ego in shambles.
Worse yet, many women these days are playing "Collect the numbers" where they tell guys that ask for their number, "I don't give my number out, give me yours and I'll call you." The poor, dumb guy thinks he just hit it big only to find out that the girl never intended to call him in the first place. She just wanted to see how many guy's numbers she could collect and compare it against her girlfriends!
So, if you don't meet women in bars and clubs, where do you meet them? Answer: everywhere else!
Here's the problem:
Many guys (like you - it's ok) actually think that you need to get all dressed up on a Friday or Saturday night and go out to meet the woman of your dreams. That's not at all how it works. Instead, you need to have your game in your back pocket at all times. That way, when you see a woman you'd like to meet, you can just walk up, run your game and walk away with a number, a date or even more.
Think about this: how many great women have you seen just walking around that you'd like to have met, but didn't feel "ready"? It happens to guys all the time. That's a huge waste of resources! In effect, you should always be "on the hunt". That doesn't mean you have to be a prowler or stalker - simply that you know how to do the basics:
* Develop "context" for the approach
* Know how to make the initial contact and "break the ice"
* Know how to establish rapport and connection quickly
* Know how to close the right way - and get what you want.
The great thing is that these aren't difficult to learn!
The other thing you need is to get yourself out there and actually meet these girls. As I said before, great women are everywhere - except in your own living room. So, by getting involved with both your day-to-day activities as well as other things that interest you, you're instantly going to run into these women.
You should definitely check out my e-book, "1001 Places and Techniques for Meeting Great Women" as it'll give you a very comprehensive list of where to meet women, but here are just a few ideas:
* Bookstores
* Car wash
* Community events (fairs, "music in the park", etc.)
* Clubs and organizations
* Classes
* Stores and malls
...and literally thousands of other places!
Lose the idea that you have to go out "hunting" and realize that you're always on the hunt. Then, you're instantly going to find great women are all over the place - because they are!
Best regards...
------------------------------------------------------------------
Have a love, dating, relationship, sex or man/woman question? You can write to me by going to: http://beingaman.com/ask_question.asp for answers. For more information about my books, "Being a Man in a Woman's Worldtm" (volumes I & II), and other products visit: http://beingaman.com/General%20-%202005/www.beingaman.com. Check out the discussion group at: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/beingaman.
Copyright (c) 2007, Dr. Dennis W. Neder
All rights reserved.
Hey Doc:
I'm 25, and I've been out of the dating scene as well as college for a couple of years now. I'm not a drinker, so I don't go to bars, and I'm not a dancer, so I don't go to clubs. So where can I go to meet someone who would date a guy like me? And what places are appropriate to approach women, and which places are inappropriate? The best I've been able to come up with is church, but pickings are slim there.
Thanks for the help.
Hello!
Actually, this is a GOOD thing - not going to bars and clubs to meet women.
Here's the reality: women often go to bars and clubs, "dressed to impress" simply to get hit on. That means that they have their "bitch shields" up and it takes some real game to get past this. Frankly, very, very few guys have what it takes to do this, so the women go home with an ego-boost having trashed a bunch of guys and the guys to home with their ego in shambles.
Worse yet, many women these days are playing "Collect the numbers" where they tell guys that ask for their number, "I don't give my number out, give me yours and I'll call you." The poor, dumb guy thinks he just hit it big only to find out that the girl never intended to call him in the first place. She just wanted to see how many guy's numbers she could collect and compare it against her girlfriends!
So, if you don't meet women in bars and clubs, where do you meet them? Answer: everywhere else!
Here's the problem:
Many guys (like you - it's ok) actually think that you need to get all dressed up on a Friday or Saturday night and go out to meet the woman of your dreams. That's not at all how it works. Instead, you need to have your game in your back pocket at all times. That way, when you see a woman you'd like to meet, you can just walk up, run your game and walk away with a number, a date or even more.
Think about this: how many great women have you seen just walking around that you'd like to have met, but didn't feel "ready"? It happens to guys all the time. That's a huge waste of resources! In effect, you should always be "on the hunt". That doesn't mean you have to be a prowler or stalker - simply that you know how to do the basics:
* Develop "context" for the approach
* Know how to make the initial contact and "break the ice"
* Know how to establish rapport and connection quickly
* Know how to close the right way - and get what you want.
The great thing is that these aren't difficult to learn!
The other thing you need is to get yourself out there and actually meet these girls. As I said before, great women are everywhere - except in your own living room. So, by getting involved with both your day-to-day activities as well as other things that interest you, you're instantly going to run into these women.
You should definitely check out my e-book, "1001 Places and Techniques for Meeting Great Women" as it'll give you a very comprehensive list of where to meet women, but here are just a few ideas:
* Bookstores
* Car wash
* Community events (fairs, "music in the park", etc.)
* Clubs and organizations
* Classes
* Stores and malls
...and literally thousands of other places!
Lose the idea that you have to go out "hunting" and realize that you're always on the hunt. Then, you're instantly going to find great women are all over the place - because they are!
Best regards...
------------------------------------------------------------------
Have a love, dating, relationship, sex or man/woman question? You can write to me by going to: http://beingaman.com/ask_question.asp for answers. For more information about my books, "Being a Man in a Woman's Worldtm" (volumes I & II), and other products visit: http://beingaman.com/General%20-%202005/www.beingaman.com. Check out the discussion group at: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/beingaman.
Copyright (c) 2007, Dr. Dennis W. Neder
All rights reserved.
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